by Bianca Li
First of all, this is a true story. I have witnesses. The L.A. dating scene can get pretty weird.
I went to Cabo Cantina for a friend’s birthday last night. Saw a good-looking guy…started dancin’, drinking, taking pictures w/ friends (to post on Facebook), and watching the Asian baseball game (in which he thought I was playing Third). Anyway, long story short: Boy meets girl. Girl goes home with boy. We get to his place. Everything’s going well. I think he’s attractive, I’m obviously attractive, and we wanna hook up……The after-bar deal at his place is getting pretty romantic at this point. The ambiance was perfect: There was a partly eaten half a sandwich on the counter, his roommate was in the living room with a girl, and their dog was sniffing my crotch.
Good boy.
We go into his bedroom. He looks at me with his piercing blue eyes and brushes hair gently off my face. He leans in for a kiss…and …his face — as gorgeous as it was — smelled like urine. Literally. WTF??? “You want some toilet paper?”, I ask. And, he gets TOTALLY offended! Dude starts yelling at me..telling me he doesn’t want to touch me. And, I’m getting really pissed because, hello???, he’s the one who smells like piss!
Look, buddy, I don’t know what you’re into, but you need to wash your face.
What a clown!
Goober. See you on Clowntowns.
(Should I wait one or two days before calling?)
Man, I guess the new Urine Pour Homme did not go over well…what a shame.
No, it did not. I really liked his outfit, though (see pic above). But, was mostly flattered that he thought I looked like the Thirdbaseman for Japan while watching the WBC on TV…
http://www.cbssports.com/photos/gallery/baseball_world_baseball_classic
Uncanny resemblance.
http://images.cbssports.com/u/gettyimages/photos/GYI0057035138032405_lower.jpg
maybe he was hangin out with R Kelly? i personally like being peed ON but don’t like my dude smellin’ like pee… what?… girls with jets can’t be kinky?
his jawline is to DIE FOR. i wouldn’t mind if he smelled like pee. but does he prefer horses or ponies? that’s the ultimate question.
The horses to ponies question you pose is a good one, Lola. Who wouldn’t prefer pretty ponies to horses??? I, personally, would prefer either to a donkey or a mule.